Zero

The more you give up, the easier life becomes.
I read that in a webtoon—a daily dose of thaumatin
to alleviate the debt incurred by reading dead men,
trespassing days to spend the midnight with Etta James
and that one question of yours hanging in the air,
‘What I’m after?’.

It took a good deal of effort to get situated
and stop celebrating arbitrary dates,
and now only the blood-stained tissues piling up in the bin
remind me of the passage of time, so I hope—
though not without the fear of contradiction—
for nothing,

nil,

naught.


More words to ponder at maciejmodzelewski.com

Crying to ‘At Last’

I don’t do Christmas gifts—or Christmas itself, for that matter—but if I did,
an Etta James record and a box of soft tissues would be plenty, I guess,
so I’m not a high-maintenance man, yet neither a good girl nor a bad one
writes my name on the tag attached to the wrapper with the Santa motif,
and not even because my solitary life has grown on me after a few years,
or my last date thought I’m a bore and didn’t hesitate to say it to my face,
but because it’s easier to cry to ‘At Last’ than muster up trust once again.